Belief that life would have been better if I died in the hospital bed plagues my mind
as there seems to be no more happiness to find
and the world labels me blind.
There seems to be no more room for philosophy
as I try to keep my demons inside me.
It's interesting how the same questions run through my head.
"When will I be free",
"when will these demons let me be".
I slowly watch my school grades plummet
as I start to submit.
Suicide seems to be the only way,
yet my friend tell me everything will be okay.
I don't want to give in because
I don't want to risk hurting my friends.
I don't see how these demons began to plague my soul.
If there is a god in the heavens then tell me how I became so cold.
I can see the way others look at me
even though they don't say anything.
I see the disgust in there eyes like I'm some sort of festering disease
as every second my soul drops 100 degrees.